Jordan joins the comedic quote troupe

My mom was feeding Jordan his dinner the other day and trying to get him to eat beets.

Mom: Here Jordan try this.
Jordan: No
Mom: Just a little bite
Jordan: (covers mouth)
Mom: (getting tired of the game) Just bite it!
Jordan: YOU bite it!

Christian's quotes

The other day Chris asked me something, to which I answered:
Me: I don't know Chris, we'll have to ask God about that.

silent pause

Chris: He said no.
Me: He did? I didn't hear anything.
Chris: It's because he talks real low.


Yesterday while watching TV:
"Mom, if you have hair here (points to his chest), the ladies really like that".

Where does he get this from?

I hope there isn't an episode on gardening

The other day Christian and I had the following conversation:

Chris: Mommy, you're a tool.

Me: What? That's not nice Christian, you don't say that to people.

Me/Ren (in unison): Where did you hear that?

Chris: On Handy Manny

Me: Oooooh. OK. Well, the little friends he has such as the hammer, the drill, the screwdriver...those are tools. People are not tools OK?, so don't say that anymore cause it's not nice.

Chris: Ok mommy.

I'm just glad he didn't call me a Hoe, that would've been a whole 'nother conversation.

Then.....This morning his teacher pulled me aside to let me know that Christian has been saying bad words and calling children names. My first thought was...oh my god he called her a hoe. I was relieved to hear that that wasn't the case, but the teacher did say that a parent had complained because their daughter said that he had called her a loser. I feel bad because I'm always telling him not to be mean. Then again, as much as we try to teach them, kids pick things up and love to repeat them. I'm guessing he either got this from daycare (where the kids are all ages) or from TV. The teacher made it a point to let me know that she called him out on it and made him apologize and that I should follow up at home by telling him not to say those things.

With all the talk of bullying on the news, I'm glad that his teacher is the way she is. However small the insult may have seemed to me at the time (vs some of the other words I imagined), it's good that they're nipping it in the bud. God knows I could've benefited from this no bullying tolerated stance in my time.

The crazy lady with the costume bin

Wow, this has been the craziest Halloween season yet! This year, ever since mid-September, I've felt like I've been pulled in all directions. It all started with my Adam Lambert concerts and then it was Christian's birthday (he had a little party at school) and then I went on a cruise to Europe for the first two weeks in October (which I STILL have not documented, yes, I know, bad blogger) and then I quickly put together the Thrill The World Miami event for this year at the last moment (I've lost several years of my life stressing over THAT one) and then I went to Halloween Horror Nights and then I went to 3 parties the night before Halloween and then I went trick or treating the actual night of. I AM EXHAUSTED! Hello November! I welcome you with open arms! The only craziness you offer me is Thanksgiving (which I don't cook, so it's not really crazy for me) and Black Friday (which I go to purely for sport).

Anyway, that having been said, back to the Halloween blog. This year, someone commented that they had seen me in 3 different costumes in one season! Oh how true that is. I'm a Halloween nut and I have a costume bin at home. Every year I just pick from there and mix and match to make my costume. I hate the pre-packaged ones, they're just so void of creativity and ingenuity. Christian is starting his own costume drawer as well because this year, he too had on 3 different costumes (Wolverine, Spiderman, Darth Vader). Jordan on the other hand, hates costumes. He clearly got that from his father. I had to struggle with him to get him to wear a superman pajama (not even a real costume, but whatever) to go trick or treating!

On to my costumes, for Thrill The World, I dressed up as a zombie of course.. For Halloween Horror Nights, you can't dress up, otherwise, you know I would've had a 4th costume. No crazy costumes there, just good ole crazy me (in the asylum house no less).

On Saturday night, our Thrill The World group performed again at Hellrotika. This was a fundraiser for Save Dade (which truly deserves its very own blog post for the vast number of outrageous and creative costumes that were in attendance...I LOVED IT!). For that gig, I was dressed up as Alice Cooper in Wonderland. I picked this because later that same night I went down the rabbit hole (not a dirty euphimism I swear) to my friend Melanie's Alice in Wonderland party. She totally went all out with the decorations and her backyard looked awesome. She goes all out with decorations just like I do (even more so I would say).

And last, but certainly not least. On Halloween night I dressed up as Junice Merill. For those of you unfamiliar with Juney, she's a character from SNL. Here's the video of the skit. I was recently introduced to her via a friend's post on Facebook and once I saw it, there was no turning back. I had to be her!

Unfortunately, I didn't really go anywhere with the costume on, I just took the kids trick or treating (and went to Jenny's Halloween campout later on). I don't think that many people would have recognized who I was anyway, so the costume was purely for the self satisfaction of being able to put it together and be a freak for a night...oh wait, I'm a little strange all the time.