Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Happy Birthday Dorkbutt!

Today is also my darling friend Ayleen's birthday! She and I have been partners in crime since the 8th grade, but now she lives 5 hours away, so I hardly ever see her. I miss her very much and wish I could be there to celebrate her birthday with her. I hope she comes to visit us soon (real soon)! I also hope she doesn't get mad at me for posting these ancient photos. Ha ha. I love you buddy! Have a drink for me and save me a piece of cake.

Happy Birthday to my big sister

Happy Birthday Patty! Were there any blind people at your party this year?

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Obnoxio gets thrown overboard

Ok, so where were we? Oh yes, unhappy camper.

At 1 am, our legs were finally stable enough so that we could walk, so we left the bar. Yes, you know you're getting old when 1 am seems like you've been out late. Anyway, we made it back to the apartment in one piece and collapsed into bed. The following day we woke up not-so-early and went to see THE Statue of Liberty (no, not the one in my pants). We had to make a huge ass line to get on the ferry that would take us to see the lovely lady. On the ferry there was this obnoxious couple. They were discussing politics and foreigners and saying ridiculous things. Lu, Lilli and I just wanted to barf on their feet and throw them overboard.

We made it to the island without anyone getting injured. We took many pictures, walked around the island, checked out the gift shop and then had lunch. The sky started to look crappy so we headed back to the ferry.

Our next stop was Ellis Island. This is where all the foreigners coming to America had to stop and get their papers in order. Yes, that is a very vague description, you would think that after spending 5 hours in the museum, I would have a more intelligent sounding description, but no. Yes, don't ask me what the heck we did for 5 hours there because neither one of us knows. We were like zombies pacing the halls of the museum, walking at a snail's pace. I'm surprised they didn't mistake us for ghosts or lunatics. All the walking was beginning to catch up with us and we needed to sit down, so we decided to go see an educational video. The lady gave a short presentation. We were trying really hard to keep our eyes open, but when they dimmed the lights for the movie, it was impossible, we were fighting a losing battle...with our eyelids. So there we are, the three of us, sleeping during the movie. All would have been fine, except that one of us (I'm not naming any names) started snoring and woke the other two up. The people in the row in front of us woke up too I guess, because they turned around and looked at us with a mean face. Either that or they couldn't believe that someone would have the nerve to fall asleep during an important historical film. Oopsy.

Fortunately for us, the only time that it rained the whole weekend, was when we were in the museum, so really, it was good that we stayed there for so long. We made our way back to Manhattan and thankfully did not have Obnoxio and his girlfriend in the same ferry with us again. Once we were back on land, we headed over to the financial district and then to Ground Zero. It's been over four years, but it's still sad to see that place. The construction has really progressed and you can see that the subway trains are in place already. They have signs there with all of the names of the people that died. They also have a sign with a timeline of the events. It's very moving and very sad. Across the street is a little church that withstood everything. It's been around since George Washington's time. I loved the architecture and the little cemetery (of course).

Ok, at this point, our feet are now swollen and spilling over our shoes. We are walking like little old ladies and can barely get one foot in front of the other. We walk for miles and finally see the bus station in the distance. "Could it be? Oh yes, thank god. It's just across the street, now if only we could make it that far. Just one foot in front of the other, one more step...oh wait. What's that? It's a Gap, and an Ann Taylor". Funny how we were dying and couldn't make it across the street, but the moment we saw some stores that were open, we regained a little bit of energy and went to see what else we could spend money on. It's a sickness I tell you.

We got back to the apartment and plopped on the bed. I just wanted to sleep and sleep and sleep, but that was not to be. We only got to rest for a little while because we had to go back to the bar to drop some stuff off, oh lord. It was freezing and we were tired and I was pouty and I looked like the unabomber. If it weren't for the eye-candy bus driver we had that time, I don't know how I would've made it.
To be continued...

Thursday, May 25, 2006

I heart NY

Hi peeps! I'm back! Did you miss me? No? Too bad, I'm back anyway. New York was wonderful and lovely. I must say I'm very impressed! I was sure that NY was going to be full of rude people, but alas this was not the case. The people were nice (most of the time, there are always bad apples) and I didn't get mugged or anything. Ha ha, you should've seen me holding on to my purse with a death grip wherever I went. Before I left for NY, I had been reading this and was laughing my ass off. I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up getting quoted there, what with all the crap we were talking while inebriated, but I'm getting ahead of myself.

We got there on Friday at 11:30pm, but didn't make it to Lilli's aunt's apartment until 2am! We were exhausted, but didn't get to sleep until 3am because we were talking and I was pumping my inflatable mattress. Apparently sleeping on an inflatable mattress is a funny thing because the girls kept ragging on me and laughing at me.

On Saturday morning we woke up bright and early and headed to the Empire State Bldg. The view was gorgeous even though I'm not a fan of heights. At first, I was not wearing my glasses, but then realized that perhaps I should put them on, because I seemed to think the Statue of Liberty was floating amongst the buildings in Manhattan. Good thing Lilli pointed out "the real" Statue of Liberty for me. Ha ha, what a dork. We then had a quick breakfast and headed over to Central Park Zoo to see the animals. The rest of the day was spent looking at pretty places and shopping. In the evening, we went to see a show called Tony and Tina's Wedding. I loved it because it was so fun and interactive, but if you're shy, like Marilu, you may not get that much enjoyment out of it because the characters are constantly interacting and messing with you. After the show we went to the bar where Lilli's brother-in-law works and he hooked us up with drinks and some appetizers (thanks Joaquin!). Let me just say that I am definitely a total lightweight. Lilli and I only had two drinks and that's all it took to get us walking and talking funny. Marilu had a couple more and by then Lilli and I were already coming out of our buzz, so we had to settle her down. Apparently Marilu has no inner dialogue when she's drunk (she also does not know how to whisper), so she was loudly voicing her displeasure with the fashion choices of all the girls in the bar that evening. I thought for sure we would get our asses kicked, but that's ok, according to Lu, because we have insurance. By the end of the evening, our feet were in dire straits from having walked around all day; we still had to go home, and I was wearing heels. Let's just say that I wasn't a happy camper. To be continued...

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

I've got a Statue of Liberty in my pants

I have been missing in action lately because I've got tons of stuff going on at once and I'm going crazy. This is the busiest time of year for me at work, so my blog suffers the consequences (there's still time for MySpace though!). I hope everyone had a wonderful Mother's Day. I did not get breakfast in bed at the bling of my alarm, but I got a different kind of bling that is nice and shiny and goes on your finger, so no complaints from me. Christian's daycare-pimping business must've really taken off in order for him to afford a present like that!

Speaking of the little man, Christian went to the pediatrician (again) today to get his final sickness clearance. The doc said that his ears are finally infection free. Thank God. After the recurrence, I figured that it was never going to go away, especially since he's been tugging at his ear again. He's been through three antibiotics already! They weighed him and measured him and he's finally starting to recuperate, but he's barely in the range he should be in. He hasn't been eating much (first because of the vomiting, then the antibiotics), so you can actually see the dips in the charts.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
So much for the benefits of breastfeeding huh? Hopefully he'll catch up now, cause there are newborns out there that are bigger than him (ok, maybe I exaggerate a little...).

On the chaos front, we're getting wood floors installed on the second floor of my house, so I've moved myself and my son out of the house for this week. I think he's allergic (as are his father and I), so I don't want him breathing in all the yuckies that are going to become airborne once the carpets are pulled up. Also, because of wood floor installation, my house looks like I just moved into it. There are boxes strewn everywhere and nothing is where it's supposed to be. It's a real disaster zone. I'd love to see how I'm going to pack my bags amidst the chaos.

Ah yes, pack my bags! I'm going to New York for the weekend and am very very excited about that! First of all because I've only been there once before on a layover (for 6 hours). I didn't get to see much except Central Park and Rockefeller Center and some stores and the airport and this really cool restaurant called Jekyll and Hyde Club (figures). I will be going with my gal pals, Marilu and Lilli, sans husbands or children, so we get to relax and have a great time just with the girls. This trip has been planned for over a month now, so I can't believe it's almost time to go! I leave on Friday and come back on Monday. Woohoo, a mini-vacation! We're gonna have a great time, I can just picture us now....~dream sequence~ ....Ok wrong sex, but you get the point.
I laughed the other day because Lilli asked me if I was a morning person. I told her that I was not. She was concerned and said "we'll have to be out of the house by 8 am" and I said, "oh, you mean I get to sleep in?". Ha ha, how things change.

I was reminded that I had to blog about my NY trip by an email that I found in my inbox this morning: "Make your d!ck bigger than a Statue of Liberty with Pen!s Enlarge Patch". Wouldn't it be hard to walk around with that? I'm just sayin'...Besides, the size of my d!ck is just fine (um, is there something you'd care to share with us Claudia?)..ha ha. Oh and I love how it says "a Statue of Liberty" as opposed to "The Statue of Liberty". I wonder which one they mean?

Monday, May 15, 2006

World's shortest fairy tale...

Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy "Will you marry me?" The guy said, "No" and the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, stayed skinny and farted whenever she wanted.

The end.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Remember that time when we...

I saw this over at Cali's blog and it sounds like fun. I hope you'll play along.

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, even if we don't speak often (or if you don't even know me), please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL MEMORY OF YOU AND ME.It can be anything you want--good or bad--BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE.When you're finished, post this paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.

The funny thing is, if I posted the real story of the events that unfolded on the night that Jen and I went to two Halloween parties, no one would believe it; Yes, it's THAT crazy/hilarious.

So, um, let's see what you can come up with. Here, let me get you started:

Claudia, my favorite memory of you and me is when we....

Tuesday, May 09, 2006


An American Haunting opened up last week. I haven't had the chance to go and see it, but boy am I itching (a little Vaginex might help with that) to do so.

Last night I dreamt that Mr. Myers (no, not that Mike, this one) was trying to kill me. Perhaps I need to cut down on the horror flicks (oh who am I kidding? I can't get enough of those, the bloodier the better). Oh, that reminds me of the time Jen and I went to the movies and someone scared the crap out of her and caused her popcorn to fly in all directions. Ha ha, that was hilarious. Remind me to tell you about it some time.

Hey, for all you Johnny Depp/pirate fans (oh, it's just me?, well he can shiver me timbers any day). Here is the trailer for the upcoming movie Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. Captain Jack is back July 7th; I can't wait! Yum yum.

I'm also dying to see The DaVinci Code, but that opens up on May 19 and I'll be out of town (I'll tell you about that another day), so I'll just have to see it wherever I happen to be. I read the book and absolutely loved it, so I'm really looking forward to the movie. I wish they would make a movie out of Angels and Demons though because I liked that book even better. You know, I don't remember if mentioned this before, but I bought the DaVinci Code for Ren (in January) so that he could read it before the movie came out and has he even cracked the book open yet? NO. I told him he is NOT allowed to view the movie without having read the book first. That should be a rule or something. The movie previews should have a disclaimer: In order to watch this movie, you must first pass a test. BYO#2P (bring your own #2 pencil).

Monday, May 08, 2006

Weekend recap

Fun times were had this weekend. On Friday, I went to visit my friend Karen. She had a baby girl on April 5th (that's 4-5-06, if you're paying attention) and I hadn't had a chance to meet her little girl. Since C-Man was sick all last month, I didn't want to risk passing anything on. Anyway, that is her on the left and her name is Isabella. She is very cute (I think she looks like her mommy).

Friday night I went to the annual Salsa Craze banquet and did some salsa dancing and partying with my friends. I know that does not look like salsa dancing in the picture, it looks more like the booty express, and I look more like a backpack than an actual passenger(ha ha), but we danced to a little bit of everything. I had a good time and was all giddy because I would get to have a drink and I didn't have to drive home. The bar tender said she needed to see I.D. and seemed surprised when she saw how old I was. Nice ego boost, I guess I blend in well with the college kids.

The little man took a dip in the pool at grandma's house. The water was a little cold (it was scorching outside though), but he didn't seem to mind. This was his first time in a pool (even if it is the smallest pool ever made). He enjoyed himself thoroughly.

He has a new little trick that he likes to do now. The other day, my mom said that he might have some teeth sprouting in. I tried to open his mouth to see the little white buds, but he refused and stuck his tongue out at me. You want to see something mom? Look at this. Ever since he discovered that he can do that, he does it all the time now. He looks so funny doing it; I crack up every time.

Friday, May 05, 2006

You decide

Photo Friday submission:


They were both gifts from my in-laws. I bet if you asked my husband to submit something, he would pick something that my mom gave us. That's just how it is. I didn't pick something that belongs to me, because usually one never thinks that their stuff is tacky. I just remembered that R just bought a t-shirt that would also work well here, but I don't have a picture of it, so these two will do. I'm sure Ren could think of many things of mine that are tasteless (like my pooping pig or my rubber chicken), but he'll have to get his own blog if he wants to share. So which one best fits the bill of tacky/tasteless?

Thursday, May 04, 2006

May the fourth be with you

Disclaimer: This post has nothing to do with Star Wars.

I'm not a major Star Wars fan (I like it as much as the next guy), but ever since I read that phrase on someone's blog last year, I've been wanting to use it.

Anyway, here are some pictures from this past weekend. We went to a BBQ in honor of my cousin Juan (that I had not seen in 10 years!). Here I am with my cousins Alex and Juan; it looks as if I have no arms in the picture, but that's just an illusion my friends, because I really do have arms, two of 'em in fact (you don't say?). The company was great and the food was delicious. Christian got to see his little friends Sofi and Gabi.

And that's all I have to say about that.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Mr. Sandman

First and foremost, I'd like to announce that Christian FINALLY slept through the night, the whole night, without even a whimper. I know that I had previously said that he had slept through the night, but this time was different:

last time, I had to wake him at 11:30pm to feed him so that he would sleep through the night.
THIS time I did no such thing, his last feedings were at 6:30pm and 7:30pm (2 baby food jars and 4oz of juice).

last time, he woke up once in the middle of the night (and went back to sleep on his own).
THIS time, not even a whimper (I slept in his room last night, so I would've heard it. I hear everything now, even the geckos on the wall).

last time, he slept 6 hours straight (from 12pm to 6am)
THIS time, he slept 12 hours straight (well, almost, from 8:30pm to 7:15am)

Yes, yes, truly amazing. I don't know what R and my mom did yesterday, but it needs to be repeated! What's funny too is that I was talking with Cristy on the phone last night and I was asking her what she did to get Sophie to sleep through the night and I was complaining about how I couldn't get C-Man to not wake up and want to eat and BAM!, he went and slept 12 hours, go figure. I'm very happy, but at the same time, I know this may be a one time thing...let's see how long this lasts.

As long as I'm on the subject of C-Man (when am I not?), I should share some of his accomplishments in the past days. He now likes to babble and say all sorts of funny things. He says dadadadada, nananana, and bababababa. He doesn't do this often (not much of a talker), so when he does I like to stop what I'm doing to listen to him. It's fun because in the mish mash of things that he says, sometimes a real word pops out. Oh look honey, he said "convertible"!

He also learned to say mama when he was sick. I know he doesn't know what mama means, but he sure knows when to use it. Whenever he wants something or he wants to be picked up he says mama. He may not know what it means, but he sure realized that saying mama gets you lots and lots of attention! He's been grabbing his feet and eating his socks too (for a couple of weeks now). He also likes to make kissy noises. He just discovered how to do this yesterday, so my mom said that the whole day was spent giving kisses. It was especially fun during meal times: spoon of baby food. kiss. spoon of baby food. kiss.

This evening, we have an appointment with the photographer to come and take pictures of Christian. This lady is great (and nice too), she comes to your house to take the pictures, so you don't have to pack all your crap up and take the baby to the studio (if you look at her website, click on "gallery"; the 1st and 8th pictures are of C-Man when he was 2wks old) . I ordered a packaged deal where she comes to my house 6 times to take pictures (maternity shots, newborn shots, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months and 1 year), so we're doing the "6 months" session today. I know we're a little late since he's already 7 months, but since he had been sick for most of April, I didn't really want all the pictures to feature a nice slimy trail of snot on his upper lip.

That's about it for my Chris update. In other news, this week's theme for photo Friday is the tackiest/most tasteless thing in your house. I of course am of superb and excellent taste, so I do not posses anything tacky or tasteless in my home, but I'm sure all of you have plenty of tacky things to share. Ha ha, no but really, this one sounds easy enough, so all of you that have been wanting to jump on the photo Friday bandwagon, here's your chance. Whip out your cameras and get going. I'm already brainstorming about what I can take a picture of that is totally tacky. If you've been to my house, please do not feel free to offer suggestions.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Pass the popcorn

Ren and I got to go to the movies this weekend (woohoo!). We wanted to laugh, so we went to see Scary Movie 4. I love stupid movies like those. Perhaps I'm easily amused, or I've got a 10 year old's sense of humor, but I love silly/stupid movies like Naked Gun, Austin Powers, Airplane, Ace Ventura, etc.

The movie was fun to watch, but as I pointed out to Ren, it isn't the type of movie that people that have been out of the loop should be watching. I say this because although I had seen some of the movies that they were making fun of (War of the Worlds, Million Dollar Baby), there were more than a handful that I had not seen (The Village, Saw II, The Grudge, Brokeback Mt). It made me feel like I've been missing out on some serious movie watching action. I miss going to the movies.

Seeing this movie has prompted me to vow to make an effort to get out and see more movies, or at least to try and catch up on missed movies via Netflix. I also absolutely love horror and suspense movies. Last year, was an awesome year for people like me, when those types of movies abounded, but alas, I was on planet Zion or something, because I haven't seen any of them. I can't even remember the name of the last scary movie I saw (and don't say Scary Movie 4, cause that's a comedy, and my memory's not THAT bad).

All this talk of movies reminds me of a story from my youthful days. One time in middle school, for my birthday (or was it someone else's birthday? I don't know) My friends and I went to the dollar movie theatre behind my house to see the movie Punchline (yes, with Tom Hanks and Sally Field). Since we were 12 years old, surprisingly enough, we didn't find the movie too amusing. Because we were the only ones watching that movie, Claudia the instigator decided that it would be fun to have a race in the theatre. Not just any old race though, we had to race on top of the seats without touching the floor (because we had poured the leftover butter from our popcorn on the floor...what terrible children!) from the last row to the first. The race was going well until the projector guy noticed what we were doing and shut the movie off. Yes, you read right, they just turned the movie off. We shit our pants (not literally, just figuratively, otherwise this story would've been included in my poop post). We ran to the front of the theatre and hid on the floor in front of the first row of seats. The theatre people turned the lights on and came looking for us. We were laying down on the floor in the front row and freaking out as we heard the footsteps getting closer and closer. Fortunately for us, they didn't think to look in the very first row. As soon as we heard that they had left, we made a run for it and ran out the emergency exit (thank G*d the fire alarm didn't go off or anything). We ran out the back of the theatre and encountered a problem when we realized that we had to run across the front of the theatre to get to the pay phones to call my mom so she could pick us up, but the manager was standing outside looking for us. This is where the mission impossible theme song starts playing because we hid behind trees, light poles, bushes and other objects and dashed across the parking lot to reach the pay phones at the supermarket; what an accomplishment that was!

Ha ha, I'll never forget how scared and I excited I was that day. A bit of a trouble-maker eh?

Monday, May 01, 2006

I see dead people

Claudia -


A person with a sixth sense for detecting the presence of goblins

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at